I love this story. It's an excerpt from an interview aired on National Public Radio (NPR) between an unnamed female interviewer and General Reinwald of the U.S. Marine Corps, who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout troop's visit to his military installation.
Interviewer: So, General Reinwald, what things are you
going to
teach these young boys when they visit your base?
General Reinwald: We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing,
archery, and shooting.
Interviewer: Shooting!? That's a bit irresponsible, isn't
it?
General Reinwald: I don't see why. They'll be properly
supervised on
the rifle range.
Interviewer: Don't you admit that this is a terribly
dangerous
activity to be teaching children?
General Reinwald: I don't see how. We will be teaching them
proper
rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm.
Interviewer: But you're equipping them to become violent
killers.
General Reinwald: Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but
you're
not one, are you?
Reportedly, the interview ended abruptly at that point.
The assumption that the capacity
to do harm necessarily means that one will
do harm underlies much of the "thinking" of those who believe that
the
function of government is to protect us from ourselves. That's the
justification for state-sponsored intrusion into virtually every
aspect
of our personal lives, and neither of the two predominant political
parties are innocent of that kind of coercive mindset. They each
attempt to enforce what they believe in different areas, but of
course
the basic premise — that they have any moral right whatsoever to
tell
other people how to live their lives — is never challenged, or even
questioned.
So it's always refreshing when someone strips away the bullcrap and
exposes the self-prepossessed arrogance that sits right down at the
root of
sanctimony. The self-righteous are always ready to let everyone know
just how much more enlightened they are than the rest of the rabble.
("I'm a Sensitive, Caring, Important Person™, and you
should take me very, very seriously!")
That
kind of moral posturing has become commonplace among those who value
political correctness over principle. They place their sense of
self-righteousness above the freedom of others to make their own
choices. They usually get government jobs...or work for operations
that are supported by state-sponsored subsidies. And if they're really arrogant (or clueless), they run for political office.
Sanctimony only sells to victims who never question their
assumptions...or don't even realize that they have any assumptions
in
the first place. You know...sheep — without which political
correctness and politics in general could not exist.
Call me a cynic, but experience hath shown that most folks will at least give a glance at a post with a title like the one shown above. In fact, most of them will devour such posts, even if the content:
- Contains no actual facts
- Has no relevance—directly or indirectly—to their lives
But if the post's content has huge, massive, humongous, enormous, direct relevance to their lives — by which I mean the security of their personally identifiable information, their privacy, and the sanctity of the property in their communications with others, I suspect that most of them will yawn, shrug, and quickly go on the hunt for some content about sex crimes, drugs, murder, betrayal and dark conspiracies.
Which is why I decided to forgo the real title of this post: "Your Helpful Security Awareness Reminder". No one's going to read something with a title like that. But fear the heck not! Please stay tuned for the sex crimes, drugs, murder, betrayal and dark conspiracies parts, which are coming up shortly.
But first, this message from our sponsor:
People of Earth:
Every once in a while I "recommend" that y'all subscribe to Sophos NakedSecurity.
I'm changing my recommendation to something more akin to a plea.
Signing up is free, and they won't send you spam. Instead, you'll
get a Monday-thru-Friday daily digest of their articles about
security and privacy. Most of them are written for the non-geek (you
and me), although I usually learn something even from the occasional
technical article. (There's always more to learn...er, right?)
I know what you're thinking: "You're nuts,
Vito. It's not 'free'. It will cost me the time it takes to read
it." Right. But look at it this way: The time it takes to
just visually scan the daily digest (less than a minute) to decide
what articles you want to read is itself
a reminder that you should be mindful of privacy and
security, and doing the basics:
Run a good anti-virus program.
Back up at least once per day.
Don't click on links in emails unless you absolutely trust the
source, and never without inspecting the link
first.
Never, ever, forward an email that tells you to
"forward this to everyone you know".
Set your cookies permissions for "this session only", and
quit/exit your browser app (SeaMonkey, Firefox, Safari, Internet
Explorer, ...etc.) when you're done browsing.
Subscribe to NakedSecurity
and follow their recommendations.
And if you still aren't convinced that it's more than
worth the time it takes to read it and follow its advice, let me
just mention "ransomware",
wherein some scumbag installs malware that encrypts everything on
your computer and then extorts you for hundreds of dollars to
provide you with the decryption key. What's it worth to not
have to deal with that?
For me, the biggest and most consistent value in having the NakedSecurity
newsletter show up in my Inbox every Monday thru Friday is the fact
that it reminds me, "Oh, right...security
& privacy. Gotta remember that!" It's easy to forget,
to get sloppy, to say "I don't have time for this now...", but do
you have time to clean up the mess if someone steals your identity,
or hijacks your computer, or wipes out everything on your hard
drive, or...well, you get the idea.
I need a reminder every day, and NakedSecurity gets the
job done. It works for me, anyway. I'll bet it will work for you.
Devotedly,
Vito
And now, for all the sex crimes, drugs, murder, betrayal, and dark conspiracies that you could possibly want, simply Google for any of those terms and you'll have more than you can stomach.
In case you haven't figured it out yet by reading Vito's posts here and elsewhere, we do not endorse any political party or political ideology here in VitoSpace.
None.
Ever.
We have to mention this from time to time so that our readers will be reminded to disabuse themselves of the delusion that we here in VitoSpace are "conservative", "liberal", "moderate", "progressive", ...etc., or any other label by which all flavors of political types label each other without ever realizing that they're all — every one of them — reactionaries.
That's what politics is all about — reacting. "There oughta be a law!" is the universal mantra of those who believe that the solution to every problem is yet more laws, as though there aren't enough already. And as though they actually solve any problems without creating new ones.
So, don't even think of cramming us into some kind of political box or pasting a political label on us. Just forget it. We are apolitical. We don't believe in politics or political states, wherein any number of people — majority, minority, or otherwise — assert that they have some fundamental right to force their will upon others under the guise of "legality".
They don't. No matter what they say.
Many people ask, "So Vito, how do you stay so young and handsome and everything? What the heck's yer secret?"
OK, OK...you dragged it outa me: Haingañese incantations. That's the secret.
"WTF?", you ask...as well you might.
Haingañese is unofficially known as "the language of those who hang out". Officially, it's not known at all. Haingañia is a secret kingdom nestled deep in the Himalayan hinterlands. I can say no more. I've been there, but I was blindfolded, so I can't tell you where it is onna counta I don't know where it is.
They have lotsa monks there, and they drink a lotta tea. It's cold. Also they have goats. Any place that has goats, you gotta figure it's different from what yer prolly used to. And Haingañia is definitely different. Check yer shoes before you go inside.
Haingañese tunage is different too. They have these horns — zoot horns, I call them; I forget what the Haingañese folx call them. They go pretty low. And they also play some kind of angular banjo type thangs, and these end-blown flutes that I call reet horns, and angular violins, and weird harps, and a giant twanger that's like a monochord with multiple strings, only it has pedals so they can change the pitch of the strings.
Interesting Historical Note: The pedal steel guitar was originally invented by a Haingañese dude (Spyottzo "Bob" Negoomniac), which is why Haingañese pedal steel players are affectionately called "negoomniards" to this day.
But the coolest thang is the Haingañese chanting. Its not like regular chanting, where you just pick a sound or a phrase and repeat it over and over. Haingañese chanting is done in short bursts...usually only two words at a time. And you never repeat anything. That's the key. You have to make it up on the spot, throw it out there, and then shuddup.
For example:
- fre'Mestokrone Broodge(!)
It's not as easy as you think. Most folx have trouble pronouncing the silent exclamation mark at the end. It takes practice.
Sometimes, when you get on a roll, you can do them in multi-bursts:
- Spimmick Rondoob(!)
- Femplone Brooveedge(!)
- Omp-Pyohnicrenkxt Fyootahmdoomblio(!)
Sometimes the Haingañese dudes and dudettes will just sit there and blatt out these chants at each other. You'd think they're having a conversation, and maybe they are. No one can tell. Not even them. But it seems to work. And it makes about as much sense to the casual listener as any political speech you're likely to hear...maybe more. It sure does a lot less harm.
Anyhow, the monks (technically...well, spiritually, I mean, all Haingaiñese are monks; but I'm talking about the professional monks here) actually write out their incantations, recording them for posterity on parchment scrolls. The collected and ever-growing body of scrolls is called The Haingañese Book of the Living, which comprises all of the scrolls ever written since the dawn of Haingañese culture.
For my part, having been initiated into the Beneficent Order of Haingañese Monkular Dudes, I faithfully record most of my Haingañese incantations whenever I feel like it. Then, when I need to Get Centered™ (whatever the hell that means) or I just need a good laugh, I go back and read 'em. It helps to say them out loud.
Yes, that's right folks! Haingañese incantations! Helps build strong psyches 12 ways. Try some today!! You'll be glad you did.
